Failconomics101

KFDX NEWS FAIL

Fail.

To begin, fail. How in the hell is that dude a newscaster? Maybe it's just me, but it looks like he just rolled out of bed (or got off his floor) after a night of heavy drinking and kiddie-porn watching. I'm sorry, but I wouldn't feel comfortable with him around my kids. Hell, I wouldn't feel comfortable around your kids. Shit, I wouldn't feel comfortable if he were around me! I won't even go into his receded hairline, either; I'll leave some room for the wrath of God. I won't, however, overlook his patchy, graying Nickelback goatee that is probably culturing some gnarly pubic lice (crabs). Let's not be greedy here, Guy. Let's give up the more undesirable feature for the undesirable feature.

In economics, that would be an example of a "trade off"... The opportunity cost of this situation would, therefore, be the, uhh, well. Hmm. Okay, that example has no answer; said beard benefits him no more than the molester vibe he emits. Now, obviously, this free-lunch-eating bastard never took Econ101, otherwise he wouldn't look like a full blown pederast. His classmate/study partner in the Econ101 class he never took was the interviewee, Tyler. Since when did he become a senior? Since when did he change his name back to Matthies? Wasn't it Chauncey? Wait, wasn't his first name "Choncey"? Obviously there are some serious discrepancies, and the segment is, thus, rendered void. Maybe KFDX should have stuck to interviewing true econ students, scholars, and professors. Just maybe.

Note: I didn't even have the will to address the dogshit that was spewed from Choncey Matthies' mouth. I left a little room for your judgment towards the genius. Your pet turtle has a better perspective on the economic situation of America than this modern-day John Locke.

Maybe KFDX should do a report on their horrendous fail.

-FailMuch?

Fa-shion-il

Colleges are petri dishes for excessive tendencies and heinous fashion trends. I'm not talking about Hollister and puka shell necklaces (which, are indeed heinous), either; I'm talking about spray-on denim.

I think that, like curricular proficiency exams, female students must be able pass general fashion assessments. Upon failure of a proficiency examination, these women will be limited to wearing bags (plastic or paper) or full-length gowns (must be at least two sizes too large). Scratch that. Any female student seeking to wear denim must meet certain prerequisites. One prerequisite, for example, should be a BMI of <30.

Harsh? Maybe, probably not. You be the judge:



Am I wrong? Am I wrong?

NOTE: Being fat is a lifestyle choice a vast majority of the time. For instance, I like beer, Taco Bell, and video games. Thus, I have decided to retire my slim-fitting jeans until a healthier weight permits their just application. Then again, I'm extremely considerate.