KFDX NEWS FAIL
Fail.
To begin, fail. How in the hell is that dude a newscaster? Maybe it's just me, but it looks like he just rolled out of bed (or got off his floor) after a night of heavy drinking and kiddie-porn watching. I'm sorry, but I wouldn't feel comfortable with him around my kids. Hell, I wouldn't feel comfortable around your kids. Shit, I wouldn't feel comfortable if he were around me! I won't even go into his receded hairline, either; I'll leave some room for the wrath of God. I won't, however, overlook his patchy, graying Nickelback goatee that is probably culturing some gnarly pubic lice (crabs). Let's not be greedy here, Guy. Let's give up the more undesirable feature for the undesirable feature.
In economics, that would be an example of a "trade off"... The opportunity cost of this situation would, therefore, be the, uhh, well. Hmm. Okay, that example has no answer; said beard benefits him no more than the molester vibe he emits. Now, obviously, this free-lunch-eating bastard never took Econ101, otherwise he wouldn't look like a full blown pederast. His classmate/study partner in the Econ101 class he never took was the interviewee, Tyler. Since when did he become a senior? Since when did he change his name back to Matthies? Wasn't it Chauncey? Wait, wasn't his first name "Choncey"? Obviously there are some serious discrepancies, and the segment is, thus, rendered void. Maybe KFDX should have stuck to interviewing true econ students, scholars, and professors. Just maybe.
Note: I didn't even have the will to address the dogshit that was spewed from Choncey Matthies' mouth. I left a little room for your judgment towards the genius. Your pet turtle has a better perspective on the economic situation of America than this modern-day John Locke.
Maybe KFDX should do a report on their horrendous fail.
-FailMuch?
Sunday, December 6, 2009
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Fa-shion-il
Colleges are petri dishes for excessive tendencies and heinous fashion trends. I'm not talking about Hollister and puka shell necklaces (which, are indeed heinous), either; I'm talking about spray-on denim.
I think that, like curricular proficiency exams, female students must be able pass general fashion assessments. Upon failure of a proficiency examination, these women will be limited to wearing bags (plastic or paper) or full-length gowns (must be at least two sizes too large). Scratch that. Any female student seeking to wear denim must meet certain prerequisites. One prerequisite, for example, should be a BMI of <30.
Harsh? Maybe, probably not. You be the judge:
Am I wrong? Am I wrong?
NOTE: Being fat is a lifestyle choice a vast majority of the time. For instance, I like beer, Taco Bell, and video games. Thus, I have decided to retire my slim-fitting jeans until a healthier weight permits their just application. Then again, I'm extremely considerate.
I think that, like curricular proficiency exams, female students must be able pass general fashion assessments. Upon failure of a proficiency examination, these women will be limited to wearing bags (plastic or paper) or full-length gowns (must be at least two sizes too large). Scratch that. Any female student seeking to wear denim must meet certain prerequisites. One prerequisite, for example, should be a BMI of <30.
Harsh? Maybe, probably not. You be the judge:
Am I wrong? Am I wrong?
NOTE: Being fat is a lifestyle choice a vast majority of the time. For instance, I like beer, Taco Bell, and video games. Thus, I have decided to retire my slim-fitting jeans until a healthier weight permits their just application. Then again, I'm extremely considerate.
Friday, November 20, 2009
Fail English Much?
Greatings, freinds!
Hear at FialMuch?, we like to dedicate alot of thyme to epicfials in the spe-rectrum of the englesh language. We like too exployt imbesils that cant' spell for shit.
Hears' a grate exampile:
(Teh iden-titties hav ben maskt bye sum ov mie favorit banned naims.)
* Epik, epik. flail. Possiblee teh biggist epik flail of all time.
Hear at FialMuch?, we like to dedicate alot of thyme to epicfials in the spe-rectrum of the englesh language. We like too exployt imbesils that cant' spell for shit.
Hears' a grate exampile:
(Teh iden-titties hav ben maskt bye sum ov mie favorit banned naims.)
* Epik, epik. flail. Possiblee teh biggist epik flail of all time.
Guess This Rider
Interesting tidbit: power meter manufacturer SRM is going to re-calibrate their systems to be measured in JCPs, as opposed to watts, in order to pay homage to this living legend.
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
Epic Fail of an Introduction
Season greetings, all!
The leaves are falling, days are shortening, the air feels cleaner than ever before, the birds are ceasing to chirp, family bonds are dissolving over elaborate smörgåsbords, suicide rates are skyrocketing, and credit is being destroyed for materialistic traditions.
Know what's even better than holiday sentiment? Citizen journalism. It's not easy being an uneducated, untrained writer, but I'm here to prove to you all that I am worth listening to. I promise that you will leave my blog feeling like you have two brains. Brace yourselves as I introduce you to the surreal world of utmost stupidity. Your moral will soar as you leave this blog knowing that, no matter how much glue you sniff, you will forever be exponentially sharper than the tools spoken of here.
Wipe the shit-eating grin off your face, wash the egg out of your underwear, and prepare yourselves for the ride of a lifetime. This blog will host more ups and downs than bipolar manic depression, and I hope you're here for every crest and crevice.
Fail Much?
The leaves are falling, days are shortening, the air feels cleaner than ever before, the birds are ceasing to chirp, family bonds are dissolving over elaborate smörgåsbords, suicide rates are skyrocketing, and credit is being destroyed for materialistic traditions.
Know what's even better than holiday sentiment? Citizen journalism. It's not easy being an uneducated, untrained writer, but I'm here to prove to you all that I am worth listening to. I promise that you will leave my blog feeling like you have two brains. Brace yourselves as I introduce you to the surreal world of utmost stupidity. Your moral will soar as you leave this blog knowing that, no matter how much glue you sniff, you will forever be exponentially sharper than the tools spoken of here.
Wipe the shit-eating grin off your face, wash the egg out of your underwear, and prepare yourselves for the ride of a lifetime. This blog will host more ups and downs than bipolar manic depression, and I hope you're here for every crest and crevice.
Fail Much?
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